When You Fall Out Of Love

As I was walking down the street the other day, I realized something. I realized that it had been days since I heard that rather husky voice of yours. I still remember how I adored it once, but now I would choose not to hear it again. Because loving you got tougher day by day. I couldn’t look at you the same way I did before. And then one day I realized that I fell out of love for you.

Amidst all these thoughts running around my mind, I felt a gentle tap on my shoulder. I turned around and there you were. Standing right in front of me, with that subtle perfume of yours. Greeting me with your smile. I didn’t know how to react. It were as if I met a known stranger after a long time.

A warm hug and a gentle kiss on the forehead it was. I wish I could reciprocate it too. But there was something stopping me. It wasn’t because I started to hate you, as we both know that there was a time when we were deeply in love with each other. All these memories just keep flashing back everyday.

Remember when we first time met in the bar, I just couldn’t take my eyes off of you. But being the introvert that I am, I just hoped that you would approach me first. I was lucky enough as we had mutual friends who introduced us. The drinks, the dancing and the flirting. That was one heck of a night. Who knew that we were missing pieces to our puzzle. We just hit it off from there. I wanted to spend every single second with you. Maybe because I was so used to being around you. Four years wasn’t a small duration after all.

I still remember every single detail about you. Things we did together. Things we did apart from each other. But I always fail to recall that single moment when I realized that after all these years I had fallen out of love for you. Was it because you did something wrong? Or was it because I was selfish and wanted more. Figuring that out is a tough job.

Falling out of love wasn’t a choice. It was something that happened little by little everyday. When you didn’t return my calls, when you woke up right next to me and didn’t wish good morning or when you forgot my birthday. The worst part is that it was never the big fights or arguments, it was always the little things. Little things did matter.

Everyone commits mistakes and forgiveness is a small thing to ask for. We would always end up forgiving each each. But forgiving the same person for the same mistake isn’t justified. Due to which I finally decided to give up on us. I don’t know if this is just a phase or this is what I want from life. Love just leaves you so confused.

Maybe it was because of you or maybe it was because I gave away so much of love that I didn’t have any left.

-Harshini Chandrika

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